New Home

Well,

 Here's to privacy (hopefully) and new beginnings (with more dirt). I have imported my more personal/academia/stepparenting-related blogs from my other blog. If you have just found me, I just need a more private place to vent, brag, be snarky, and bask in my own glory (or human-made disaster) and this blog is it. I have another blog where my privacy was being infringed upon (mostly the kids/husband/BM's friends knew about it) so I decided to come to a place where I could be more..."frank" without..."repercussions."

Enjoy (or not...I don't care.)

-Me

More academic dreams (literally)...

I rarely remember my dreams from the night before unless they are particularly traumatic, odd, or wonderful.



I believe last night's dreams acheived all 3 of these standards and so I must share.



Okay, preface: I have a "dream version" of SCU in my head. That is, whenever I dream about my university, I dream about the same place that doesn't actually exist every time. It has the same elevators, the same offices, the same layout, the same stairs, etc. but looks actually nothing like the real SCU. I don't know why my mind creates a familiar dream landscape for me, but it does (I also have dream versions of my parents' house, Walmart, and "my house").



In dream-SCU, the faculty offices are in a building not unlike the faculty office building on my campus. But the building inside has an atrium instead of elevators in the middle. Kind of like this...

But without the French Quarter theme.




My dream-SCU faculty building has corresponding offices for each of the professors I have dreamt about. Dr. Heartthrob's office is in the right corner across the way from the elevators. Dr. A's is 2 doors to the right of the elevators. Dr. Redhair is in the office next door to Dr. Heartthrob's, to the left. Et cetera. And there is a pool on the roof.



The pool is a new addition, brought to my attention only last night. It is heated and indoor and fairly private and I'd advise you to not go swimming in it as [at least one of] the faculty members apparently do naughty things there with undergrads [and possibly each other]... I'll let you know if it is still open next time I visit dream-SCU.


But my dreams did not end there, my friends. They did take a different turn though. We will now leave dream-SCU and travel to dream-gritty nightclub. This one still had an academic theme though, as my favorite professor had put me on the guestlist to come watch him play with his hair-metal cover band.


Ah, yes. There was my mentor, wearing a dusty blue bandana tied around his head, shredding tasty licks on the guitar, accompanied by a band of imagined 40-somethings who worship DLR as god-of-all-that-is-holy. After the set, I sat around backstage with this motley crew (pun intended) and we took shots of something opaque and notwhisky out of salt shakers (FYI: notwhisky = my word for everything people that aren't me take shots of). Dear mentor did instruct me to "take the top off" as I skeptically eyed the concoction in the less-than-conventional vessel.


What would Freud say? I don't even want to know.

Compromises & Separations

Ah... I will be surprised if I still have any readers left after my long hiatus. I just haven't been particularly inspired to "blog it out" these past couple of months. I have been quite busy and once I do get some down time, trying to write something clever and smart for my adoring fans (er... fan) just doesn't sound appealing.

I am going to give a brief synopsis of events that have transpired since I last left you, in bullets so I don't ramble (as we know I can tend to do when given the opportunity to talk about myself).

• Birthday: beers, Katamari Damacy, more beers, low-key, now closer to 30 than 20 (I have even seen a decline in my getting carded for booze and cigs... And my best friend gave me eye cream for my b-day...)
• Holidays: *shudder* Moving on...
• School: finished one semester, started another last week. This is going to be the best semester ever. I can feel it. All is going so well. Both of my presentations (one paper, one poster) were accepted to regional Psych conference. This news deserves an entry of its own when I haven't had a couple beers. I'll just go on and on about it and what a wonderful mentor Dr. A is and what an honor it is to work with him and how brilliant I think we are and what a badass I think I am and blah blah blah. ;)
• Found community of stepmums who blog, tweet, and otherwise express all of the feelings and thoughts that I had thought I was alone in thinking and feeling. What an enlightening experience it was to discover this and then become a part of that support system for such a confusing and unique experience that only we stepmoms truly understand.
• I cried after the Cowboys lost to the Vikings last week. I am not over it yet, and won't be until spring training starts back up. Even then, I think this one may have hurt the worst yet (Fucking fire Wade already, jebus crust).

Live long and wear a rubber,
Me

The Daily Show 01/14/10

I was on The Daily Show tonight! And they didn't make me look like an idiot! And Jason Jones waved my dildo around while I made out with a chick! Haha.
Just so you know, I would ONLY make out with another girl [on film] for 1.) Jon Stewart and 2.) equality.

I've got blisters on my fingers!!

*Secret prize to the one who can tell me where my title quote comes from!*

Oh my jesus. What a gruelling couple of weeks. Two poster presentations (one of which was a report of my original research...so proud! Significant at p < .001 in support of my hypotheses, bitches!! Rock n Roll.) I (and my research assistants...*ahem*...colleagues) submitted the abstract from our research poster to Regional Psych Conference so that might be cool. I'll already be there to co-present the study Dr. A and I finished this semester so why not? The study I designed was novel in the method I used to measure this particular phenomenon, and with such significant results (even controlling for extraneous variables), two of my professors are encouraging me to write up a manuscript and submit it for publishing. There went my winter break!! Ha! Can't hurt my chances of being accepted to #1 Grad School Choice.

I also gave an oral presentation last week. That was traumatizing and I don't want to talk about it. Although I will tell you that Prof Red Hair did not give my group feedback on/approval of our powerpoint until the NIGHT before the presentation, although I submitted them before Thanksgiving...3 times...emailed her the week before the presentation to make sure she got the files... She claimed she never received the files - although I sent them from 2 different email accounts, over Blackboard, and at 3 different times... So, I forwarded her the email "sent" receipts along with the powerpoint Saturday 12/5 (Presentation was scheduled for either 12/8 or 12/10...her choice and a "surpise" found out by each group at the beginning of class 12/8). I didn't hear back from her after her "I got the files, have this back to you asap" email Saturday night so I emailed her AGAIN to "gently remind her" on Monday morning (day before possible presenting) and she claims she sent the files back (w/comments) on Saturday (I didn't get anything...in either email account...in either junk folder) and resent them to me. So, my group, who were waiting to practice the presentation until we got her approval of our slides (which she had us change the actual organization/structure of the presentation itself DRASTICALLY, although all content was fine so practicing prior to those changes would have been pointless anyway). We got to practice 2 1/2 times before class the next day (between morning class and Dr Red Hair's class). With an entirely new format (order) of the slides. We thought maybe she'd assign us to present on Thursday since we were the only group who hadn't heard back from her by the weekend of Thanksgiving... Nope. She had us go that day. Less than 18 hours after she let us know about the drastic changes we needed to make to our presentation... I was prepared as in I knew that material inside and out but I only got to practice it outloud twice, during which I ended up cutting out most of my "in depth" slides for time (and they were so awesome!) so I actually never got to practice the final product before presenting.
Dr. Red Hair is now Dr. Fucking Cunt. The presentation went fine as far as staying on time and getting our points across but my usual enthusiastic, confident speaker-self was too nervous and angry to be anything other than monotone, trying not to talk too fast, could be a freshman speaker.

We got an A but lots of "constructive comments" about our obvious nervousness, monotone speech pattern, lack of enthusiasm, checking our notes a lot (although not reading straight off of them), and lots of hesitations. Yeah, I wonder why...
Oh well, I didn't complain and I didn't make any excuses because it wasn't worth it. And I could tell that she knew she fucked that one up.

Thursday, after my two posters, I was interviewed with my hubby by one of The Daily Show correspondents for a segment airing after the 1st of the year. Can't give specifics but they did send a crew out to my house, who turned my living room into a TV studio, complete with make-up artist. It was so much fun. If you catch it and you know who I am, please know that I would only ever do such things for Jon Stewart, The Daily Show, and to rub my immoral progressive-ness in the faces of all those conservative bastards denying basic human rights to those they've deemed undeserving based on archaic fairy tales written by patriarchal, homophobic assholes.

Anyway, the semester is almost over. After last week, I have been struggling to give a flying fuck about finals but finals are a breeze at this point (I actually studied during the semester and went to almost all of my classes this semester!). I aced my first final in the Cog Psych class. I also got a 90 on my History of Modern Science final although I haven't submitted it yet (online exam - all essay). I think the professor made a "best guess" as to what students would make so he could take off (he travels a lot) and forgo the whole grading essay question test answers thing. Ha.

Anyway, this was a gruelling semester (15 hours, 3 research studies - 2 of which I designed, all upper level classes - mostly 4000 level) and I am ready for a (few) beer(s) as soon as I get out of my last final on Thursday afternoon. Drinks around 4pm Thursday at local bar in SCU town! Who's down?? ;)

-Me

Inane Statistics

I've been thinking about how inane the phrase, "I don't want to be just another statistic," is. I mean, you are always part of the statistic. For example, the statistic that relates the chance of 2nd marriages involving children from a previous relationship is highest in the first 2 years of remarriage... I made it past 2 years but that just means that I'll be in the part of the data set that either divorces in the first 5 years or after the first 10 years or stays married til death do us part. I'm still a statistic.

Inanity.

I know, weird post for such a long hiatus but I have a shit ton on my plate right now and I don't feel like sharing. So deal. :p

Doctors and Dentists and Deadlines, Oh My!

So, I have a shit ton o' work to do but I'm taking a break to tell you that I love my doctor. My Primary Care Physician is a super-religious man who doesn't believe in evolution and always cracks at least 5 jokes referencing the age difference between me and hubbie (he's our family doc so he also loves to tease my stepkids by asking about their "new sister" when they go in with their dad...). He also blames everything that ails me on my vegetarianism (or being married to an "old guy"). Some of his jokes are tolerable because they give me a chance to come up with some snarky comeback, displaying my infallible wit (Ha!), and he stares at my boobs a lot (which is funnier than his jokes).

But I can overlook all of his misdiagnoses and pseudo-comedy for the fact that, although his patients typically describe his script writing as "stingy" (to say the least), he never holds out on me when it comes to the good meds. I don't know if it's because I'm so witty or so titty, but I always get the good shit without having to ask. Hell, maybe it's cause I don't ask for it. Whatever. All I know is I had an appointment today to get him to look at my face again (I've had a crazy rash since June, which he has misdiagnosed twice now, bastard) and I walked out of his office with antibiotics (for my impetigo, the latest diagnosis, and I believe the correct one), a hand full of Soma samples (and not like 4 but like 24), and a script for 60 Lortab. Granted, in addition to the Impetigo mess on my face (not the impetigo that has crazy pus-filled blisters, by the way, but the strep strain one, which still looks like shit though not as leprous as the staph one...but I digress), I also mentioned the immense pain caused by throwing my back out last week. It has gotten better than it was (think unrelenting sharp pain when you move and when you're completely still), and I mentioned that it isn't as bad this week, but, like I said, he throws the good shit at me. Maybe he feels sorry for me because he thinks it must suck to have caught "being old and decrepit" from my hubbie (which explains all aches and pains, apparently).

Anyway, just thought I'd brag about my awesome legal stash of drugs. I also went to the dentist to get a replacement crown (my permanent crown, done by a different DDS, recently shattered) and they pulled some strings (aka forged some documents, I think) to get it covered by my insurance (fucking enough with the preexisting condition clauses already). Saved me $800. Today was a good healthcare day, thanks to the health care providers and not the insurance fuckwads, of course.

Oh yeah, and shame on you, Maine. I cried when I heard about your vote to deny legal marriage rights to same-sex couples, even though this basic civil right had already been granted by your state legislators. And I never fucking cry. Just think, if they had let the states vote on slavery and racial equality laws, we'd still have slaves in the South... This is why equality legislation needs to be enacted at the federal level. There are too many small-minded, religious fucks who are stuck in their hateful ways to ever move past this unfair, yet still legal, discrimination present in our state law books.

And, kudos for trying, Washington State, but "separate but equal" is not equal. I mean, personally, if I had fallen for a lady, marriage wouldn't have been a big deal for me. Let the church keep their ancient rites. The institution of marriage is an archaic practice based on religious beliefs anyway. I only got married for the tax breaks (and the life insurance). To me, love doesn't need the constraints of ancient tradition to thrive (monogamy isn't natural, but that's an entirely different blog). Civil unions are alright with me and my hypothetical lady love. I would just want the same legal rights that the privileged heterosexuals get when they get hitched. But, if you are going to do this "separate but equal" crap and turn marriage into this holy grail that cannot be sullied by us dirty homos, then you have made it into what it is. Civil unions for everyone (gay or straight) and let the church perform their marriage ceremonies as a separate entity OR legal marriage for everyone. Love is love is love is love and no one can govern that, no matter how hard you try.